Saturday, November 6, 2010

dont want you to be my joy

'This is a semi-new saying Brennan has begun to say pretty regularly. He will say "don't want you to be my joy..want you to be my mommy." I'm not sure the origin of his thought..if he has heard people call be by the name "Joy" and he is referring to my name..But, being the overanalytical, psycological thinker that i am..i have taken it as a lesson to my soul.
I AM NOT TO BE HIS JOY. GOD IS.
I think as a mom, especially fulltime stay at home momos..we have a temptation to be the one our children look to to bring them joy, love, all the things that only God can really give. I have been convicted many times of my control issues with our children, especially Brennan. I believe one of the main reasons God gave us Knox so quickly was to break me of many sinful tendencies as a mom. I realized how much I like to be in charge and make sure that "my will is done on earth as God's will is in heave" hahaha (stole that from the speaker this weekend..) God began revealing that sin in my heart not long before Knox was born and i am learning to trust God not myself with our children. For if i trust GOD always does what is for my good then who better to trust?!
I recently began to really think about how our childrens' lives are (and will be) different from those around them. I remember how odd my family seemed growing up not allowed to watch very much tv, homeschooled for a couple of years, no 2 piece swimsuits. We didn' t have curfew because my parents knew where we were EVERY MOMENT of everyday and most of the time that included them. When i had a sleepover, my friends were part of family devotionals at night..There are things about that that are hard & hard to understand as a teen or tweener.
Discipline, family dyanmics/relationships (mom-dad, dad-son, brother-brother etc.) finances, possessions, oportunities..all of this will look different from the world for our children. What are we to say? I read this in Deuteronomy 6 and it REALLY encouraged me. Maybe it will do the same for you:
... It is the LORD your God you shall fear. Him you shall serve and by his name you shall swear. 14You shall not go after other gods, the gods of the peoples who are around you15for the LORD your God in your midst is a jealous God—
..."When your son asks you in time to come, 'What is the meaning of the testimonies and the statutes and the rules that the LORD our God has commanded you?' 21then you shall say to your son, 'We were Pharaoh’s slaves in Egypt. And the LORD brought us out of Egypt with a mighty hand...And the LORD commanded us to do all these statutes, to fear the LORD our God,for our good always, that he might preserve us alive, as we are this day."

Which goes right along with our children's first memory verse, Ephesians 6:1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 "Honor your father and mother" (this is the first commandment with a promise), 3"that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land."

I am to teach my son to find his joy in God, in obeying God..I am to teach him to enjoy GOD and all His wonderfulness! Children naturally are drawn to God's creation, just take a walk with any 2 year old. They see things you don't..! Am i marveling with them in this or just brushin off their excitement abou God's creation which reflects HIM?!!